Biblical Parenting and Spanking
The phrase, "Spare the rod, spoil the child," is not in the Bible.
What the Bible does say however, is:
Proverbs 13:24 - "He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him." NIV
Does this mean you spank your child everytime he does wrong? It doesn't say that. There are definitely times when a child needs to be spanked, unless you have an unusual child. However, you don't have to use spanking as your only means of discipline. I agree with Dr. James Dobson, that spanking should be used for defiant behavior when the child is testing you. He says it is not appropriate to spank a child for childish irresponsibility.
The child must know what is expected of him or her. In other words, you have to tell the child what he can or cannot do. You set the boundaries. Once the child knows and understands what is not acceptable behavior, then you can discipline the child for doing the unacceptable behavior. Children will test you; that is what they do. Although they will never say it, they want you to teach them limits and self-control. An out-of-control child will be scared and wonder whether you really love him if you are letting him do whatever he wants. He may even boast that he can get away with anything, but in his heart, he is scared because no one is stopping him.
Proverbs 22:15 - "Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him." KJV
You do not want to raise a foolish child. The Bible has many scriptures about the downfall of fools. So don't be afraid to discipline your child.
Psalm 23:4b "Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me." NKJ
In the well-known 23rd Psalm, David says that it is a comfort that the Lord corrects him. Shepherds used the rod and staff to rescue, protect and guide sheep. So they are symbols of the shepherd's love for the sheep. The shepherd is watching over them and guiding them to safety. As the Lord guides you, you are to guide your children.
Proverbs 29:15 "The rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother." NKJ
The rod and rebuke refer to correction and discipline, an undisciplined child shames everyone, especially the parents. To raise a wise child, you must correct him.
Proverbs 29:17 "Correct your son, and he will give you rest; yes, he will give delight to your soul."
It is the parents responsibilty to correct their child. A responsible and obedient child will bring you pleasure and delight. So do not let your child win the tests against your authority and your will. Be resilient and know that they are testing the boundaries to learn what is right and what is wrong. They need you to be consistent and teach them how to grow up to be responsible adults.
About the Author
Bonnie Foshee http://www.BiblicalParentingTips.com http://www.child-success-secrets.com
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