Don't Let Your Marriage be a UFO
After the first session or two, one of the women began to talk about her UFOs. She and her daughter were talking, so I thought it was just a code word the two of them had come up with. A little later she took me on a tour of her house and showed me her box of UFOs - unfinished objects - that she had accumulated over the years. There was a dress that needed a hem, a quilt that she had started for her granddaughter, a cross-stitch wall hanging that was nearly done, and myriad other projects that she had either lost interest in, weren't turning out as she had planned, or were beyond her abilities at the time and got too hard.
I realized, too, that especially in my crafting experience, I too had many UFOs. I don't have nearly as many now because I got rid of them before I moved into my new home, but if I were still in my old home, those UFOs would be stashed here and there just waiting to be picked up, finished, and proudly displayed for the world to see.
Beyond those projects that we can see and feel, however, lie many relationships and promises that have become UFOs. What about that phone call you have been wanting to make to a friend, the lunch date you promised your son, or the camping trip your husband has been wanting to take? How many UFOs do you have that only you know about because they relate to actions rather than projects?
Paul, through the Holy Spirit, knew that we would have trouble completing tasks. Many times he wrote to "fight the good fight, finish the race, keep the faith, lay hold of the crown that is waiting for you."
UFOs are especially prevalent in marriage. Look again at the reasons that my friend's craft projects were unfinished: she lost interest, they weren't turning out as she had planned, the colors were too bright or too dull or just didn't go together, or they were beyond her ability at the time. She had taken on more than she thought she could handle and instead of getting help she gave up.
If your marriage is strong, keep it that way, keep running the race that has been set before for you. Don't let Satan cut in on you and get a foothold.
If you have lost interest in your marriage or it is just too hard or you don't seem to "go together" anymore, take time right now to pray for guidance. Ask God to show you how to be interested in your marriage, how to do things together that are fun and fulfilling. Ask God to help you fit together as you did when you were dating or to give you wisdom in dealing with things that seem to be beyond your ability.
Seek help if it is needed. There is no shame in seeking counsel from your pastor or a trusted Christian friend who has a strong marriage.
If you are married, the race before you, the one you are called to complete, is a strong marriage that is focused on God. He will help you. He will sustain you. He will give you wisdom and help you complete this task as He has many others.
If there must be UFOs in your life, let them be tangible projects like a dress or a quilt or even the laundry, but not your marriage. It is worth finishing and finishing well.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Hebrews 12:1-3
About the Author
Claudia Pate is the owner of The Anniversary Shop, an online store dedicated to helping celebrate wedding anniversaries with gifts based on traditional and modern gift themes by year.
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