Beyond Food, Fun, and Football
asking each person to come up with 12 things they are thankful for this year and spend 2 hours sharing all of them, all the while trying to keep the men and children from leaving the room.
While I am in no way trying to downplay the role of Thanksgiving Day in America's heritage or in the lives of Americans, in God's word we read that thanksgiving is an attitude, not just a day of the year set aside to think and act in a thankful manner while sharing a traditional Thanksgiving meal.
We are to be thankful always, in all things.
Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. I Thessalonians 5:16-18
I do contend, however, that thankfulness is not a part of human nature. It is an attitude that we need to cultivate, which means that your thankfulness might need to start out as intentional thankfulness. By that I mean that if you are not in the habit of being thankful, or do not have a thankful spirit, you might need to make a list of things for which you are thankful.
As you make your list of things you are thankful for this year, share them with the people for whom you are thankful. While it is good to share your list in a group, share individually with each person the things on your list that pertain to them.
This is especially important in marriage. Take a few minutes before the day begins or before you fall asleep to share privately with your husband the things you are thankful for in your marriage and in him. You might think that your husband already knows that you are thankful for him and for the things he does for you and the kids, but still he needs to hear it from you.
This year before we head out for Thanksgiving weekend with my mom, 2 brothers, 2 sisters, 2 sisters-in-law, 1 brother-in-law, and 12 nieces and nephews, these are a few of the items I will share with my husband about why I am thankful for him.
I am thankful that he knows and loves the Lord and desires to help others come to a saving knowledge of Christ.
I am thankful that he brought to me 3 wonderful step-sons who have now given us 2 beautiful daughters-in-law and 3 grandkids.
I am thankful that he worked full time and attended Seminary part time so he could have a second career when he retired from his skilled trades job of 30 years.
I am thankful that we spend within our means.
I am thankful that I am safe with him, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.
I am thankful that he loves my family, as weird as we may be at times.
I am thankful that he always has my best interest at heart.
I am thankful that he sometimes plays the guitar for me in the evenings.
I am thankful that he is an extrovert and gets energized by having people around even though it sometimes drains me (an introvert).
And the list goes on and on. The more I write, the more I can think of, and am reminded that I really do need to tell him all these things and more.
Take some time to write your own list. Even if you don't find the time on Thanksgiving Day, find the time soon to share your list with your husband with no expectation of a list in return. You might have to wait a while to hear what your husband is thankful for, but you will hear it - in lots of unexpected ways.
And, as you look forward to New Year's and your New Year's resolution(s), add "cultivating a spirit of thankfulness" to the list. You will never regret this resolution and it is one that gets easier and easier as you practice it.
Happy Thanksgiving!
About the Author
Claudia Pate is the Department Editor for Marriage Builders on CWR. She is also the owner of The Anniversary Shop, an online store dedicated to helping celebrate wedding anniversaries with gifts based on traditional and modern gift themes by year.
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